Written on Wednesday, April 18, 2007 by Jessica
Well, I don't know what to make of this. He stopped nursing Sunday afternoon. He would start to nurse as if he wanted to, but after five seconds or less, he would break latch and start to cry. He wouldn't take a bottle either. I assumed it was his top teeth, which were cutting through.
He's been crying a lot lately, particularly when he wakes up (middle of the night and in the morning) and before he goes to bed. He just doesn't want to nurse. He takes a bottle only once or twice a day, about three ounces at a time.
This morning I asked my in-laws to start giving him breastmilk in a cup with his meals. We got him up to ten ounces of milk today as opposed to just six yesterday. Can you believe it? The kid is drinking breastmilk with a straw.
Just a couple of weeks ago I was worrying about how he would only fall asleep while being nursed or while getting a bottle. Suddenly he's falling asleep without even a pacifier. When I try to nurse him, he cries, but I can't tell if it's because nursing is somehow painful or if it's because he's mad at me for trying to make him nurse.
It doesn't seem possible that he could be weaning so early. Plus, weaning is suppose to be gradual, not sudden -- yet his teeth don't appear to be bothering him anymore, and teething is a common reason for nursing strikes at this age. He's not tugging at his ears, either.
I hope this will pass. I'm not ready for him to wean. No baby is supposed to wean at ten months.
Posted in
Breastfeeding,
Motherhood
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Written on Wednesday, March 14, 2007 by Jessica
Today's special is artificial sustenance with a side a failure and dollop of disappointment. For our drink special we have guilt on tap, enough to swim in.
Formula has found its way onto the menu today. Freezer stores are gone, production hasn't increased. So formula it is.
On a rational level, I realize that formula isn't the end of the world, but that didn't keep me from crying yesterday when it became clear that I wouldn't make enough milk for today.
I might as well tell everyone the truth. I'm pretty insecure about being a mom (who isn't?), and breastfeeding was one thing I could point to as having done right. I might've had drugs during delivery, but by god, I breastfed. I might do a million things to cause irreversible emotional damage as he grows up, but at least I breastfed.
All the obstacles, pain, and difficulty -- well, they served to increase my pride for sticking with it. And now it's slipping away. I didn't make the year mark. Is my milk going to continue to dwindle to nothing?
I'm not giving up, not yet. I have More Milk Plus on order. I might even try Lactuca Virosa.
This post is such a downer I'm going to have a make a point of posting something a little happier.
Posted in
Breastfeeding,
Motherhood
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Written on Monday, March 12, 2007 by Jessica
Each day, I'm not pumping enough milk to cover the next day. My freezer stores are nearly exhausted. Over the last few days, I've been taking herbs, drinking more water, eating oatmeal, pumping more often and engaging in extra long nursing sessions to no avail.
In the past, herbs have resulted in a nearly instant boost. I don't know why they're not working as well now. I'm really worried. In the past, even when I had trouble keeping up via pumping, I still had enough milk for nursing. But lately he's been nursing for loooooong stretches and fussing as if he's not happy with the amount of milk he's getting. I've never encountered this before, even during growth spurts.
If something doesn't change soon, Seth will be drinking formula the day after tomorrow. I know, I know. Big deal, right? But it's my goal is to keep him formula free, and I'm about to fail. It's a lousy feeling.
Posted in
Breastfeeding,
Motherhood
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Written on Wednesday, March 07, 2007 by Jessica
Nope. I'm having supply issues, mostly because I'm not diligent about pumping while I'm at work. I should pump three times during the nine hours I spend here each day, but I usually pump only twice, and sometimes only once. The tedium of it is terrible.
Boo hoo. Poor pitiful me. I'll take some cheese with my whine, thank you, but no wine with my cheese -- I'm nursing.
Posted in
Breastfeeding
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Written on Wednesday, February 07, 2007 by Jessica
I didn't even know which blog to post this on. "Defy Comprehension" won: The other white milk.
Posted in
Breastfeeding,
Rants
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Written on Sunday, January 21, 2007 by Jessica
A couple of weekends ago I developed a nasty little stomach bug that promptly segued into a cold. Other than being tenacious, the cold hasn't been so bad. I'm nearly ready to take down the quarantine sign outside the front door.
I'm happy to report that, although Baby's Daddy came down with the nasty stomach bug, Baby has shown no signs of illness other than the barest hint of a runny nose. Yay, breastmilk!
Posted in
Breastfeeding,
Miscellany
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Written on Tuesday, January 02, 2007 by Jessica
I forgot to extend my sincere thx to my sister-in-law, Tiffani, who helped me out last week. I was surfing when I happened to find this fantastic baby bib. Naturally, I wanted it immediately. Fortunately, Tiffani was online and available via Google chat. "I'm about to pay $15 for a bib. Please stop me," I wrote. (Yes, $9.99 for the bib; $5 for shipping.)
And stop me she did. Thank goodness.
Other cool bibs & shirts:
Boob Man
Lazy
More Lazy
Posted in
Breastfeeding,
Darn funny
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Written on Friday, December 29, 2006 by Jessica
I just realized that I made it six months breastfeeding.
I can still remember when I was pregnant, imagining how I was going to breastfeed for a year or more. No pacifiers, no bottles 'til I returned to work. Just me an' my baby. I'd heard that some people had difficulty nursing, but I figured I wouldn't be one of them. I might have problems in the beginning, but I'd get them ironed out and would be effortlessly nursing in no time.
Then the reality of a child latched to my nipples set in. At six weeks, I was in such despair. I didn't know how I was going to survive even three months, let alone an entire year. The pain was so much more than I imagined possible. I couldn't nurse long enough to increase my supply. He was getting one bottle of formula every one to two days. I felt like a miserable failure. (And I wasn't even dealing with anything serious like mastitis!)
But I kept at it, and slowly things began to improve. I worked tirelessly on the latch. We never got it exactly right b/c it always hurt, but it helped to have a decent latch. I took herbs to boost my supply (being fuller made nursing less painful). I alternated sides, nursing on only one side each session. By far, this helped the most. Once he started eating every three hours, it meant that each side would get a six hour break in between nursing sessions.
And now here I am at six months, toting my pump around work, making enough milk to be formula free (yay me!), and knowing I can nurse as long as I like.
Posted in
Breastfeeding,
Milestones
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Written on Sunday, December 03, 2006 by Jessica
It's days like today, or rather middle-of-the-nights like tonight, when I feel like chucking breastfeeding. Been treating thrush now for five weeks. Baby shows no sign of it, but I still have an uncontrolled yeast overgrowth on my nipples. I'm sick of boiling toys, bottle nipples, and pacifiers. I'm tired of the endless pain and itching. I also have a plugged milk duct. Boo hoo. Poor me.
I'm thinking of starting Gentian violet. Having no luck with prescription Nystatin and fluconazole (Diflucan). No luck with a vinegar wash, either.
UPDATE (12/6/2006): Midwife prescribed All-Purpose Nipple Ointment (APNO). Started seeing good results in just three hours. Feeling much more hopeful.
Posted in
Breastfeeding
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Written on Tuesday, November 21, 2006 by Jessica
A national nurse-in at Delta ticket counters is set for today. I wish I would've known. The nearest Delta ticket counter is about an hour-and-a-half from here. It's a little too late to just take off and go. And who says Seth would want to eat just then anyhow? (Picture me shoving his face into the milk maker, shouting, "Eat, child, eat!")
On the other hand, I feel a little sorry for Delta. This is turning into a PR nightmare, and technically, Delta didn't kick off the woman. A partner airline, Freedom Airlines, is the one that did it. I was aware of this when I wrote my complaint e-mail, of course, but I still knew Delta would have to be the one to put pressure on Freedom to change its policy. And it's working.
Sorry, Zoe. Come back next week when I'm finally over my righteous indignation. I'll try to start writing about another subject. :)
Posted in
Breastfeeding,
Complaint letters
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Written on Tuesday, November 21, 2006 by Jessica
Delta's reply:
Dear Delta Customer,
Thank you for expressing your concerns.
Delta Air Lines is disappointed to hear about the removal of the passenger onboard Freedom Airlines Flight 6160. As you may know, they are one of our Delta Connection partners. The employees involved were Freedom Airlines employees. No Delta employees were involved in the decision to remove Mrs. Gillette from the aircraft.
Delta supports a mother's right to breastfeed her baby onboard our aircraft. Please let me assure you that we are working with Freedom Airlines on their investigation of this matter. Following the results of this internal investigation, Delta will work with Freedom (a subsidiary Mesa Air Group) to ensure that their procedures mirror Delta's service standards.
Again, thank you for contacting us. We will always welcome the opportunity to be of service.
We genuinely appreciate your support and trust.
Sincerely,
Ruth Jones
Online Customer Support Desk
http://www.delta.com
I'm satisfied with Delta's response. I'm willing to fly their airline again, assuming that it actually does put the squeeze on Freedom Airlines over this incident.
Posted in
Breastfeeding,
Complaint letters
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Written on Wednesday, November 15, 2006 by Jessica
Remind me to never fly Delta.
I wrote an email to bitch:
I'm appalled that a family was kicked off a Delta Connections flight because the mother was breastfeeding. The flight attendant and the airline should've used better judgment. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15720339/
If the airlines are going to start banning breastfeeding women who won't cover up, they'd better start banning women with low-cut tops as well. After all, a breastfeeding mother doesn't display any more cleavage than a low-cut top. The baby's head blocks most everything.
I'm aware that Delta and Freedom Airlines are different entities, but Delta should exert its influence to stop such nonsense in the future.
I have to admit, I've written better complaint letters. What's this business about low-cut tops? Oh, well. I was pissed when I wrote it. I'm thinking about following up with a better-written paper letter.
Update: By the way, I learned about this incident at
Working Moms, a new site for (you guessed it) mommies who work.
Posted in
Breastfeeding,
Complaint letters
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Written on Monday, October 30, 2006 by Jessica
As mentioned previously, I had to make sacrifices during the nursing strike. Namely, I was forced to hack off my index fingernail to use an SNS. See the carnage for yourself:
Posted in
Breastfeeding
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Written on Thursday, October 19, 2006 by Jessica
I haven't kept you updated on the nursing strike. It ended just as quickly as it began, although he continued to be fussy about nursing from time to time. I wrote a cutsie little newspaper article about it for you, but I didn't publish it b/c I wanted to include a photograph of my naked index finger -- the one without a long beautiful fingernail (see article below for explanation).
Anyhow, I'm utterly frustrated. Tonight he absolutely refused to nurse even though he was clearly starving. Here are some reasons babies refuse to nurse (i.e., go on strike):
- Mommy has eaten something that has given the milk a yucky taste.
In this case, unlikely. He eats anything I pump without complaint. If he didn't like the taste of the milk, he would occasionally refuse a bottle. - Baby has an earache, which causes suckling to be painful. (The jaw motions hurt the ear.)
This is not our problem. As mentioned above, he eats just fine from a bottle. Furthermore, he shows no signs of any other earache symptoms. - Baby has thrush, which somehow makes nursing uncomfortable.
Actually, he does have a minor case of thrush. The pediatrician wasn't even going to treat it, but I mentioned that my nipples were stinging after a feeding, so she prescribed treatments for us both. Here's where I'm confused. The lactation counselor said sometimes thrush causes breastfeeding to be painful while not affecting bottle feeding, but I'm skeptical. Why wouldn't bottle feeding be painful as well? Furthermore, we've both received treatments for several days, so the thrush symptoms have cleared up.
- Mommy has slow letdown, so baby gets mad.
Sooooo not the case. My milk always seems to be instantly available. - Mommy smells funny.
I haven't changed my deoderant or detergent, and I don't wear perfume, so this isn't the case.
Because nursing strikes are more common in bottle-fed and pacifier-using babies, I can only conclude that he has decided he like bottles better. Conventional wisdom says he's getting milk faster from a bottle, so he prefers it, but that just isn't the case. We're using low-flow nipples, and furthermore, I happen to produce a bunch of milk at the beginning of a feeding. I'm certain that I actually deliver it faster than a low-flow bottle.
Bottom line: He's just being stubborn. In the beginning, I said I was more stubborn and could wait him out, but tonight I began to wonder how I can take eight more months of this. Yes, tonight was extreme, but it's a daily occurance that he's become difficult about breastfeeding. Most of the time, he'll nurse for only about five minutes and then refuse to nurse any longer, which means I'm feeding him again in two hours instead of the normal three. And it's really frustrating to have to relatch forty or fifty times in a single session, which is how we go about nursing an entire meal two sucks at a time.
I'm so tired that I'm just blathering on and being utterly boring (or "udderly" boring -- ha! which reminds me, I'm thinking of being a cow for Halloween). I'll go away now. Here's the cutsie article I was talking about, still sans the photo of my missing fingernail:
Tentative agreement reached between management and union
AP - Mommy management and baby union leaders announced a tentative agreement today to end a week-long nursing strike. Baby union's only demand was to be bottle fed at all meals, but Mommy management refused to make any concessions, going to far as to call in scabs in the form of a supplemental nursing system (SNS) and a nipple shield.
An SNS is a device that delivers bottled breastmilk to the baby through a small flexible tube. The tube is usually taped to the breast to encourage a newborn to nurse by rewarding him with small amounts of milk. In this case, the SNS was taped to Mommy management's index finger, which Baby union happily suckled. A nipple shield is a device that fits over the mother's nipple to protect a cracked or very sore nipple while nursing. In this case, the nipple shield tricked baby union into thinking he was suckling a bottle.
Events came to a head on Saturday, when Mommy management threatened to take away the three bottles that Baby union received each day while she was at work. In that case, Baby union would have to be spoon fed instead. However, a lactation counselor-arbitrator ruled this step unnecessary.
Although Mommy management was reluctant to make concessions, the strike was not without sacrifices. Mommy management was forced to lop off her index fingernail to use the SNS.
Posted in
Breastfeeding
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Written on Monday, October 16, 2006 by Jessica
A recent study says breastfeeding doesn't enhance a baby's IQ. However, it does confer many other benefits.
According to the study, breastfeeding moms tend to be smarter moms, and smarter moms tend to provide a more stimulating home environment. This results in a higher IQ in the baby. So if you're a smart mom (or even a not-so-smart mom) who loves your baby and provides a stimulating home environment but couldn't or didn't breastfeed, you needn't worry any longer that you're baby will have a lower IQ than breastfed babies. If you're like me, you probably already have tons of other things to feel guilty about, so cross this one off your list.
Note: In case your wondering, I'm still breastfeeding (with only *four ounces of formula supplements in the last four weeks -- yay!). This article has no effect on my decision to breastfeed, nor does it change my resolve to weather this nursing strike...
*Four ounces in the last four weeks. That's down from a bottle of formula a day while I was on maternity leave! I'm really excited about that.
Posted in
Breastfeeding
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Written on Friday, October 13, 2006 by Jessica
It's official. He's on a nursing strike. Suddenly the breast is some horrific beast he wants nothing to do with. He screams when I put it anywhere near him. Fortunately, I'm still smarter and more patient than he is. :) I can still get him to nurse when he's half asleep (that's the "I'm smarter" part) or half starved (that's the "I'm more patient" part). Yes, it's true. I had to wait him out yesterday evening. I let him cry until he was half starved and willing to eat.
Basically, he wants a bottle, but I won't give it to him. He already gets three bottles a day while I'm at work. He doesn't have thrush or pain while eating because he eats from a bottle just fine. It's not a scent issue, either. I'm wearing the same deoderant as always, and I never wear perfume. Haven't changed laundry detergent or fabric softener. The little bugger is just mad that he can't have a bottle.
Mean mommy.
Posted in
Breastfeeding
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Written on Thursday, October 12, 2006 by Jessica
He isn't nursing well, but I'm not so sure it's an acutal nursing strike, because he's not utterly refusing to go to breast. He eats for about five minutes and then gets really fussy -- latching on like he's still hungry but then pulling away almost instantly and fussing. Grandma says he takes his bottles like a champ.
I wonder if the milk flow is ticking him off. His behavior coincides with a precipitous drop in production.
Posted in
Breastfeeding
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Written on Monday, August 14, 2006 by Jessica
Once upon a time, in a life that seems far away, Seth had a plethora of ways to tell me he was hungry:
1. Attempt to devour his hand.
2. Root around the bosom of some unsuspecting (and mortified) thirteen-year-old girl who is holding him.
3. Smack his lips.
4. Try to latch onto air (my personal favorite).
Nowadays, I bet you can guess how Seth tells me he’s hungry. Yup, that’s right. He screams.
Now, don’t get me wrong. I don’t necessarily have anything against screaming as a method of communication. The problem is that screaming can mean so many other things besides, “I’m hungry”:
1. I need to burp but can’t.
2. I need to poop but it seems to be stuck.
3. I need my diaper changed.
4. I’m hot.
5. I’m cold.
6. Daddy pinched me.
7. Daddy tossed me into the air and it scares me. (Okay, Seth never seems to mind being tossed into the air but it scares Mommy.)
8. I want someone to hold me.
9. I want my pacifier.
In any case, I'm starting to get used to dealing with trial and error every time he cries.
Posted in
Breastfeeding,
Motherhood
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Written on Tuesday, August 08, 2006 by Jessica
I had to throw out all the milk I've pumped and refrigerated/frozen over the past two days. Seth was absolutely fine drinking formula. He was fine while nursing. He was completely fine until I reintroduced the breastmilk I stored. After that, he spent the rest of the evening screaming. Do babies get sore throats? I feel awful for feeding him something that put him in such misery.
Posted in
Breastfeeding
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Written on Tuesday, August 08, 2006 by Jessica
My sweet baby boy is experiencing colic-like distress. It's certainly not true, full-blown colic, but it doesn't leave me any less heartbroken as he screams inconsolably.
We've begun narrowing it down. It's not the formula. (I still supplement b/c my milk drops inexplicably about every third day.) The next step is to begin eliminating foods from my diet since something is probably creeping into my breastmilk and causing havoc. First, I'm going to eliminate caffeine. This won't be hard b/c I quit caffeine about three years ago. I accidentally drank some last Friday and Sunday when I had Sunkist orange pop (that's "soda" or "soft drink" to you non-Midwesterners). Because Sinkist is orange, I incorrectly assumed it didn't have caffeine. Seth's distress seems to have coincided with the introduction of caffeine. (Fingers crossed, as it's an easy fix.)
If his colic continues, the next step is to cut down or eliminate cow's milk. Let's hope we don't have to take this step. I LOVE milk.
Posted in
Breastfeeding,
Motherhood
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