Alleged crazy dude

7

Written on Monday, March 05, 2007 by Jessica

The guy in this article, Suspect arrested in wife's dismemberment - CNN.com, is allegedly crazy for allegedly cutting up his wife. Well, I have lots of proof that he is in fact crazy.

First of all, he allegedly cuts up his wife in Detroit and then flees north. (North to practically my backyard, by the way. The article names my county, Emmet. I live only two miles from Bliss township. The alleged crazy dude is recovering from hypothermia at the local hospital, which is only three miles from where I'm where I'm sitting now. Gee, we're famous. It was CNN's top story yesterday, so the locals are all aflutter.)

But I digress. I'm supposed to be proving he's nuts. Who flees north to a barren, peopleless wilderness? Go south where there are people and you can blend in! Go south where it's warm (especially if you plan to huddle under a tree in just your shirt, pants and socks -- no wonder he's hypothermic and frostbitten). Go south where you're not trapped by water on three sides! He must've forgotten that Michigan is peninsula.

Okay, okay. You're right. I haven't proven he's crazy. All I've proven is that he's stupid. However, take a look at this photo and tell me he's not a psychopath:


UPDATE: CNN has changed the article. Sigh. I always forget that they change articles related to developing stories. It no longer mentions Bliss township. The local sheriff is no longer quoted as extensively. I guess his fifteen minutes of fame is about up. I wish I would've thought to quote some of the info. At least then it wouldn't sound like I was making stuff up. :)

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7 Comments

  1. Z.M_Aguilar |

    HMM, he reminds me of Dave Matthews, from the Dave Matthews Band....
    I wonder if he is pretending to be nuts?...I mean, crazy. Others have done it...act crazy i mean.

    Z

     
  2. Jessica |

    Dave Matthews does look pretty weird, uh, intense, when he sings.

    The Alleged Crazy Dude has now confessed to cutting up his wife. In my book, that makes him crazy and nuts.

     
  3. lisa's chaos |

    If your town is like ours that was your excitement for a year or more. :) We had a police chase last year and that was ours. The guy was in a semi! Idiot, outran cops for 5 counties until they blew out his tires, he kept going around our town but finally enough tires were blown he gave up. Your dude should hook up with the idiotic trucker and scram! :)

     
  4. Christina |

    Ahh claim to fame...at least he wasn't in your backyard and that he was caught!

     
  5. Danielle/Brooke |

    I did see this on the news when it first broke and I thought him to be quite stupid to run north.

    It reminds of the story Dad would tell about a prisoner that escaped from the camp who wasn't from the area. He escaped in the WINTER! Idiot! He ended up calling my dad collect at work asking him to come pick him up he was lost and cold. ha ha!-Danielle

     
  6. Jessica |

    Woah, Lisa, how does a guy in a semi outrun the cops? But yeah, you're right. This is tons of excitement. It may even last us two years.

     
  7. Jessica |

    No kidding, Christina. I live far enough out in the country that if I saw a human figure in my backyard, I would be totally freaked out. I would seriously grab the gun, toss Seth in the car without even bothering to buckle him in, and we'd be outta there.

    Danielle, I also seem to remember a time when some guy escaped and was nearly eaten alive by the mosquitoes.

    In case anyone is wondering, Danielle's dad used to work at the local minimum-security prison camp, which has since been shut down. For years it didn't even have a fence, but most inmates stayed put.

     

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